So The Publisher Doesn’t Like Your Song?

Here’s the scene:

You’ve put every ounce of creative juice into this one masterpiece. You’ve counted your syllables, you’ve leaned on hard rhymes, and your hook is killer. Every line of the lyric brilliantly supports the hook. (How will you stay humble?!)

If all that isn’t enough, then there’s the melody. Holy cow, the MELODY! You LOVE singing it. It just ‘feel’s right. It fits in that perfect pocket. Genius.

Let’s just be honest. If you had to choose between THIS song and your first born, you would actually have to have a quick internal dialogue about which one you love more.

Piano keys

THAT is how stinking amazing this song is.

…and then the unfathomable happens.

You play it for that publisher you’ve been trying so hard to impress and, well, they just don’t “get” it.

“I mean, it’s technically correct, but it just doesn’t do anything for me.”

WHAT?

SAY THAT AGAIN A LITTLE CLOSER TO MY FACE, HOT SHOT!

You start growing your horns. You’re ready for battle. Who does this joker think they are?

You breathe in. Breathe out.

You remember that burning bridges is a bad idea at this point in your career.

You thank them for their time and leave with your tail tucked.

By the time you get to the car, you’re fighting back tears.


Why do I even mess with this?  
Why bother?

The music industry stinks.

Everybody hates you.

…it’s all just a…

HANG ON!!!!!!!!!

I’ve been there. Shoot, I’ve been on both sides of that. I’ve gotten that reaction and I’ve given that feedback.

Here’s what I suggest, Gang.

1. Stop.

As writers, and especially as new writers, we pour so much of our precious time and thought in our songs that it can be hard to distinguish the line between where we, the person, ends and where the song begins. You have to remember that the person listening is only seeing what’s on the page and hearing what’s in the room. They are having a reaction to the SONG, not to you. When a listener doesn’t like your song, it is not a commentary on your worth as a human being.

2. Ask.

If you really need to know, then ask. “Is there a particular part that’s not working for you?” “Do you see anyway I could improve it?”  But remember, the answer could just be ‘no.’ And trust me, whatever you do, don’t start defending the song. It’s over. It’s done. You’re not going to convince someone to love a song by being defensive. Thank them for their time and move along. (Note** If you handle this step right, you could actually get a future meeting with a new song! Again, trust me.)

3. Decide.

Based on the feedback you got, now you have to decide. Do you want to play the song for someone else? Do you want to shelve it for a while and see how you feel about it in a few months? Do you want to rework it? Regardless, DECIDE. Do NOT let the experience roll around in your head and defeat you. Make a decision, do what you need to do, and get back to work.

Remember, at the end of the day, you’re the writer and you get to decide what to do with your feedback, but navigating this field can be tough. Write the best song you can write today, and then tomorrow, write the best song you can write tomorrow. Always, ALWAYS take the good with the not-so-good and use it to get better.

 

Five Excellent Questions for Writers to Worry About

Five Excellent Questions Writers Worry About
Worry: to torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts;fret. (dictionary.com)
If there were sashes and tiaras to be awarded for being the Best Worrier, I would have a collection.  I would have a title for every day of the week for every week of the year.  

I am an excellent worrier when I set my mind to it.  I can deeply and profoundly worry about the color of my living room wall and the lack of color on my bathroom wall. I can worry about whether my grass is going to grow in the spring and whether I am living the life I am supposed to be.   I can worry that I’ll never write another song again, and I can worry that no one will ever write with me again.  ALL IN THE SPAN OF TWO MINUTES.

Yes, gang, I could be the Homecoming Queen of the University of Worry.  

The good news is that I’m in recovery.  Step by step, a little at a time, I’m learning how to STOP the absurdity.  I’m starting to let go of my responsibility to take care of the entire world and everything it holds.  As it turns out, the Savior has come, and it is not me.  

Whew!

When I look at the definition of ‘worry’ and it includes the word ‘torment,’ I totally get it.

Worry is torment.

So, in order to give myself some perspective, I started replacing the word “worried” with “tormenting myself.”  For example, if my old sentence was I’m worried about that, my sentence now is I’m tormenting myself about that.

I know that worry is wasted energy. I’m intelligent enough to see that I can worry all day about something and it is not going to help the situation.  Regardless, I still do it.  However, I’ve realized that switching the word ‘worrying’ out for ‘tormenting myself’ changes my perspective. I have no interest in tormenting myself.  Do you?

Torment sounds so dramatic.
And no one likes a drama queen.

If You Insist

Here is my list of five excellent questions you as a writer can torment yourself with, though, if you insist.  These are questions we all ask, and questions which are brilliant time-wasters. If you’re looking to be more popular at the University of Worry, these are the top five tormentors.  

(I’ve also included my answers in case worrying is getting boring and you’d like to move on.  Further, I’ve included a gratuitous shot of Bernice as a puppy purely for manipulative purposes.)  

1. Am I crazy for pursuing writing?

Yes.  

Welcome to our club.

2. Who am I to think my words matter?

Who are you not to think they matter?

3.  Am I a good enough writer?

Keep writing and you’ll find out.

4.  What if I never get published?

Writers write.

5. Do I look fat today?

Did you look fat yesterday? Well, there’s your answer.


Why don’t you try replacing the word “worry” with “torment” for the next 30 days.  Just see if it makes you feel as ridiculous as it does me.  Then, take all that new mental space and focus on something good and positive.  I bet you’ll love the results.

To your adventure–

Belinda