I Had to Disappear…no, really…

Posted on March 15, 2014 by belinda

I knew the past 6 weeks were going to be busy. I thought I was ready for it. I had mapped out my schedule, penned in slots for everything I needed to do, prioritized and pep-talked myself all the way to the beginning of the start. I was psyched. I was ready.

My mantra: No matter what, be kind to yourself.

And for the past six weeks, I was on airplanes every week, I was in an intense Life Coach certification school, I was finishing up my very first ever Christmas musical (insert shameless plug here for, “Once You’ve Seen the Star,” coming soon), and I had a heavy disability advocacy case load (which meant lots more studying.)

Well, you’ve heard what is said about the best laid plans…

Gang, at about week 3, I looked around and thought, “Holy Mother of the Cows! What have I gotten myself into?!”

Calls started going unanswered, emails unreturned, I was missing Facebook messages, and my friends were thinking I’d left town for good.

At the point panic was about to take over, and under the heading of being kind to myself, I took an afternoon off. I happened to be in New Bern, NC, and it was a gorgeous day. So, I locked up my computer, my cell phone, my files, my manuals and my worries, and I just walked around. I wandered in and out of galleries and tiny specialty shops. I ate toast with butter (a HEAVENLY accident) at a little diner. I perused the Pepsi shop—the place where Pepsi was invented, and I took a long walk around the bay.

In other words, I took some time to participate in the world outside of ‘me.’ I stopped focusing on Princess Belinda (gasp!).

During that afternoon, I appreciated all kinds of beautiful and fun things. And to be honest, it was course-changing.

On the plane flying home to Nashville that night, I decided that for the next few weeks, there were some emails and calls that were going to have to go unanswered. I was going to postpone the launch of Dashboard Poets AND my 1-on-1 Mentoring course. My newsletter wasn’t going to go out, and I was going to miss a few social gatherings. And that was ok.

Sometimes you have to be where you are.
Sometimes you get your answers when you’re not actively looking for them.
And, like my Dad always says:

All you can do is ALL you can do.

And it’s ok.

…because when you get back from your personal hiatus, you’re going to be ready to get some serious stuff done!!! BAM!

Do You Ever Just FREAK Out?

Posted on January 28, 2014 by belinda

So, picture this: I got on a plane and flew to Savannah, GA, for dinner. For DINNER!

Well, okay, it wasn’t just any ol’ dinner. I threw my name in when Susan Hyatt announced her, “Girlfriends Gone Wild” event. One night, 20 fabulous women, a little life coaching and great food.

Doesn’t it all sound like fun? Well, it was. …until it came time to actually ENTER the restaurant.

See, I’ve always had this ‘thing’ about walking into rooms of people I don’t know. It’s odd—I can be on stage in front of thousands and not bat an eye. I can teach a group without a moment’s hesitation. But to just walk in to a room of strangers and have to start making small talk???

Jesus, take the wheel.

Guess what? THIS IS SOMETHING I HAVE TO DO! I mean, I just big fat have to do it sometimes. Why?

Relationships are everything.

Relationships are imperative for what we do. (Yes, for WHATEVER we do.) And, no, I’m not talking networking. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want anyone’s business card unless I want it, and it’s likely that I don’t want it if there’s no connection. (Soapbox for a another day.)

So here’s how I handled my good, old-fashioned FREAKING OUT about entering a room of people I didn’t know.

1. I decided on my question.

You know, the question—So, what do you do? I spent a lot of years working at a job that in no way defined me or gave much insight into who I really was, and it was during that time that I stopped asking people what they ‘did.’ I’m not as interested in what someone does as who they are. So, I started asking other questions—What do you like to do for fun? or I’m planning my next vacation. Where’s your favorite vacation spot? Based on who was going to be attending this particular event, I decided my question was, “So what are you most proud of?” (…it was a good one.)

2. I decided on my answer.

Even though I don’t love the question about what I do, I knew I was going to be asked. Here’s the start of my answer: My name is Belinda Smith, and I work with the best people in the world.

3. I reminded myself of why I was there in the first place.

I was there to meet, be inspired by, and to inspire amazing women. …and I’d just taken a night away from home to do it. SOMEONE was going to make it worth the trip whether they liked it or not!

Needless to say, I stepped out of my comfort zone in a BIG way. And, yes, it was worth it. For me, though, thinking about how I was going to show up and the kinds of conversations I wanted to have really did help the room-anxiety. It was like I’d given myself a road map of sorts, and Heaven knows we all need a little direction.

So, now that you know about my ’thing,’ do you have tips on how YOU do this? How do you do parties with strangers? HELP ME OUT HERE!

The Single Best Way to Get What You Want

Posted on March 28, 2012 by belinda

I was at a lunch meeting with some particularly successful and powerful women.

You know how you can just tell when someone at the table would like the salt passed to them? You know that whole non-verbal thing that happens? When they don’t want to interrupt the discussion so they just act uncomfortable until finally someone notices and hands it over?

Well, Lauren wanted the salt (name changed to protect Lauren’s identity). It was just out of her reach.

As the lively discussion carried on, she did the entire routine we all do when we need a condiment we cannot politely reach. Honestly, Lauren’s performance was pure perfection. If an award existed for a, “Non-Verbal Please Pass the Salt Routine,” Lauren would have totally won it. It was so silently compelling that I almost got up myself and took her some from my end of the table.

However, her Salt Gatekeeper didn’t seem to notice. She kept right on talking and laughing as if nothing were happening.

Salt Gatekeeper is a beautiful woman of about sixty, and she runs a highly successful company. Salt Gatekeeper is impressively on top of things, and what I would call a ‘mover and a shaker’ in town. She lives on a fortune of great decisions, and she is well-liked by everyone. It was actually almost weird that she didn’t catch Lauren’s plea for salt.

Finally, Lauren gave up and started eating without it.

However, in a matter of minutes, I watched Lauren’s countenance go from ‘So Happy to Be Here’ to ‘I Hate Everyone and Everything.’

Her entire mood changed. She withdrew from the conversation, she stared at her plate, and she slumped her shoulders. It was so noticeable (finally, she got noticed!) that Salt Gatekeeper asked her a pointed question. It was an obvious attempt to draw her into the conversation.

Lauren just shrugged and said, “I don’t know.”

She didn’t participate in the rest of the meeting.

At all.

Really.

She pouted for the rest of the lunch.

Over salt.

As we left the fabulous restaurant, Salt Gatekeeper reached for Lauren’s arm. She looked her dead in the eyes and said, “Honey, if you don’t learn to ask for what you want, you’re never going to get it.”

With that, she turned on her heel, got in her big, shiny Mercedes and drove away.

What’s the best way to get what you want?

Ask for it.

Now, pass the salt and point me to my awesome new car.

To Your Adventure,

Belinda

In Business and Creativity: When Possibility Happens

Posted on March 10, 2012 by belinda

A few days ago, I was having dinner with a friend. She said, “Belinda, there is a momentum around you right now. What are you doing?”

A momentum!

Cool.

Without really thinking about my answer, I said, “I’m encouraging people, and it’s what I was put here to do. I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”

I started Belinda Smith Creative because I wanted to make it official, but the truth is I’m not doing anything that I didn’t already do. I’m a born-encourager and I get real joy out of seeing people surprise themselves in magnificent ways.

I asked my friend about her business, and as she began to tell me how she was running it—or more accurately how her business was running her–I gave her three ideas about where she could make money now with just a little effort. I was just brainstorming on the spot, but I could completely tell when ‘possibility’ happened for her.

The moment she realized that she could work a little differently (not more) and get faster and better results, her entire countenance changed. A light bulb actually came on in her head.

My ‘possibility’ happened when I created my songwriter Tune-Up academy.

When I decided to leave all the old models I knew behind and create the program I personally believed in, I wasn’t sure if anyone would get on board. I’m elated that regional writers ARE on board and they are changing their thoughts and their communities. It was a risk, but it has been one of the best things I’ve ever done.

We get so stuck in our own ways of doing things that sometimes it is hard to move our own thoughts out of the old patterns.

I’ve done it in my business, and I’ve done it in my songwriting.

If we do what we’ve always done, we’ll get what we’ve always gotten.

My challenge to you this week is to find one thing in your life that needs a little prodding forward and take action toward making a change.

If you want to start exercising, start walking.
If you want to finish a song, then take the week and finish one.
If you need to find some new and meaningful song ideas, then sign up for my Free Creativity Lesson (you’ll be surprised how many ideas you’re missing).

Do something to move yourself forward this week, and this time next week you’ll feel AMAZING!

To Your Adventure,

Belinda

p.s. Let me know how it goes!

Belinda Smith Creative

…before the song is the idea.

Tag Archives: Business

I Had to Disappear…no, really…

Do You Ever Just FREAK Out?

The Single Best Way to Get What You Want

In Business and Creativity: When Possibility Happens